What happened to the “thanks” in Thanksgiving?

I understand that the economy is hurting – we all feel it and have to acknowledge it in one way or another in our daily lives.  But this year the retail “push” to move the economy back up with a rush to the Christmas shopping craze just seems like too much!!  My kids’ HALLOWEEN costumes were barely off their backs before the stores were putting up the holiday lights, wreaths and plastic bulbs! The Christmas season hasn’t even started yet and I’m almost tired of the hype.

How can we take back Thanksgiving and enjoy that 4-day long weekend with a pause to reflect on all of the people and things in our lives that are going well? And some days it is hard to see the positive and be grateful for what we do have when we continually run a dialogue on what we don’t have.  And some days I am as guilty as the next person – especially on those gloomy, overcast Mondays.  L  All the more reason why we as parents need to take back Thanksgiving – in any way we can:

• Push employers to reinstate that Friday as a standard holiday – too many of us are either working that day, especially in retail at ridiculous hours, or are using up a vacation day to make sure we aren’t rushing back into the office.  How do we get that Thursday and Friday as mandatory days off across the country? Does it take an act of Congress or each of us on a local level asking employers to be generous with an extra day?
• Take a walk through the neighborhood or the local park with your kids.  Reconnect with them by not even having to say anything, just stroll down the street; comment here or there about what you see.  If you need a destination to make it helpful, I always aim for coffee or hot chocolate as a simple reward.  (Though some weeks I use that “reward” more than I should – I do like my cappuccino.)
• Rake leaves – the old fashion way!  Enjoy the noises and beauty of nature all around you.  The soreness of your arms, the crunch of the leaves, the chill in the air marking the changing season that is coming – you can’t notice those signs when you or your neighbors are constantly running that leaf blower!!!  I hate the noise those things make – it always gives me a headache and is such a noise polluter.  And it is not very social.  When you rake leaves together, everyone has a job and talks.  With a leaf blower, it seems to always be a one-man job all by yourself.

These simple things can help us remember the purpose of Thanksgiving in the first place:  family, friends and the gratitude for the things we do have around the table after a hard year.

Side note: I’ll be watching to see what happens in the coming weeks with the retail figures.  Did we use up all of our budgeted dollars for Christmas at 3 am on Thursday evening and that’s it for the season?  Or will there be a steady stream of purchases for every week leading up to the holiday to demonstrate a real recovery?  It might be a roller coast of emotions and reports as our retail dollars are tracked.  There is always the hope of those last minute shoppers, when the deals come back out again, right before the holidays.  That’s more my pace – I always do well with a deadline no matter how much I plan ahead or try to shop in July.  Yet there is always the guilt of someone I missed or someone on my list who I bought too much for throughout the year.

All the more reason why we need to take back Thanksgiving: a paradigm shift to a more grateful society.  A thank you for kids comes in many forms – a quiet game of “Go Fish” and a hot chocolate are amazing in the way they help us connect, at any age.

How to be an Effective PTA/Parent Leader

The first step in being an effective leader is understanding that PTA is a team. As a president or parent leader, you need to build a team out of your officers and chairpersons. (Officers and chairpersons may also need to build teams out of the committees that work under them.) Having a team atmosphere encourages productivity, keeps the workload more balanced, and leads to happier volunteers.

Just like in sports, a team does not mean that everyone is involved in everything. If the pitcher on a baseball team tried to play pitcher and catcher because he didn’t like how the catcher threw the ball back to him, or if the quarterback on a football team tried to play quarterback and wide receiver because he felt the receiver dropped too many balls, or worse yet, if the coach decided to replace a player and get in the game and play himself ... it wouldn’t be much of a game and the other players would wonder why they were even there in the first place!

Similarly, your PTA should be set up so that your officers and chair people have responsibility for certain things. When delegating responsibility, make sure each team member understands what their roles and responsibilities are. Show them where to find the information they need to perform their duties and provide any deadline or budget considerations they need to know.

If necessary, offer your experiences to help guide them and answer any questions they might have, but don’t make decisions or do the work for them! You have given them a job to do, so let them do it – even if that means it is not done exactly like you would do it yourself! Don’t micro-manage them. Allow them to make self discovery and empower them to take action. This builds your leaders of tomorrow and ensures the long-term success of your PTA!

• Understand there will be glitches along the way. Be supportive and be there to offer encouragement or advice, but don’t take over for them! Allow your team members to work through any difficulties in their own way. Just like we tell our children, people often learn more from their mistakes than they do from their successes.
• Keep the team informed. Each team member has an obligation to keep the team as a whole informed of the actions they have undertaken. This does not mean reporting in every time you do something; however, officers and chairpersons should be prepared to report on the status of the things they are responsible for at each board meeting. Reports may be submitted in writing in the event someone is unable to attend a particular meeting.
• Lastly, model appropriate behavior for your team – patience, respectfulness, reliability. Don’t gossip or project negativity as that will rub off on everyone. Always point out the strengths of the team and the individuals who are a part of it. Provide lots of praise and recognition. A “Thank you. You did a great job,” goes a long way. When team members are given the flexibility to fulfill their respective roles in their own, individual ways, the benefits are tremendous, not only for the PTA as a unit, but for the school and all of the students as well.

The wheel has been created – USE IT!

So I attended the State PTA Convention over the weekend along with some training from a National PTA representative.  My feelings are mixed…

On the positive side, it was great to see a “changing of the guard” in that many of my fellow Board members are new to their positions like me.  It is motivating that new energy and new perspectives are coming to the state scene and back to the districts.  It is also amazing to realize that we have 100 years of experience and resources backing our efforts with state and national tools to utilize.  I have other Region VPs that I can call upon to help me, not to mention the communication, finance & membership experts at the state level and also a network of other units across the nation as positive examples!! All this energy to bring to our local BSD members!

On the other side, attendance was not what I would have hoped for at a 100 year celebration and my first state convention.  It shows that we have to re-invigorate and re-dedicate our efforts as parents and our commitment to PTA – especially in this decade as so many things are happening in public education.  (Did you know that the PTA is behind the fact that we have Kindergarten today and that there are federally funded lunch programs – items we might take for granted today are all because of past PTA efforts.) 

We need parents to be involved and stay informed -- the data shows parents make the difference.  Motivated parents are a tipping point to children’s success. 

And so many groups are trying to “re-create the wheel” by pulling together parent resources – i.e. Parent Engagement teams at each school, Parent Advisory Councils, the Parent Center Resources, Parent Learning Link, Partnership Zones, even RttT plans across the state target parent involvement, etc.  Yet when you look at their core efforts, they seem to be trying to recreate the PTA. 

• With over 5 million PTA members today, it’s hard to replicate their current and historical efforts.  So why not re-commit to the PTA? USE IT to improve our schools and their services! They already have the resources developed and ready to be unleashed.
• PTA has so many programs, initiatives and resources – from a variety of training, legislative monitoring to supporting arts in the schools and curriculum focus.  A network of help and organized effort is so close and ready today to be used.  (And the cost to join is a simple membership due equivalent to an expensive cup of coffee?!!)
• With the Common Core State Standards grant here in DE, the PTA is here to re-invigorate the advocacy part of parent education. They have presentations, training tools, pamphlets, DVDs, etc. to help inform parents now.

Let PTA bring these efforts to your next local meeting and group to share, inform, educate and motivate our parents. CCSS and PTA will help all of us to “walk the talk” together and support ALL children to reach their full potential.

I’m ready whenever you are – join me to celebrate and kick off the next 100 years of PTA in our state and our district.   Imagine what BSD could do with strong, committed PTAs at every one of our schools!

BSD 2012 Operating Referendum – PARENT EDUCATION

Thank you to Lancashire PTA for allowing me the chance to speak about the upcoming BSD Operating Referendum and my observations and background knowledge as a parent on the topic. It is a LOT OF INFORMATION that parents must digest in order to understand future actions needed.  I believe we need to start educating ourselves now so that, as parents, we can understand these pending events that can impact our kids for years to come.  If we are passionate about something that’s happening in our district we need to raise our voices sooner rather than later.  There is strength in numbers!!

Here are 2 interests that came out of that presentation that I am looking for parent action by responding to this blog posting.

1.)    Transportation costs and safety of current routes – I am further investigating these costs within the district budget.  I mistakenly indicated that they were an individual school line-item, but they are on the district level and I am inquiring.  I will post my findings on the blog when received.

Similar to my experience, a few other parents after the meeting have voiced concerns about stops along Naamans, the speed of traffic and omission of stops within neighborhoods.  I’d like to begin collecting specific parent names & emails that are interested/concerned about this topic.  Future presentations, attendance at district meetings, offering solutions and just showing our collective parent voice, can help raise the safety concerns we have.

2.)    Testing and Assessments – More parents need to raise their voice if ANY PART of the current assessment is an issue for them.  AND WE NEED TO FIND EACH OTHER AND SPEAK UP.  There is definitely strength in numbers on this topic as well and I need to hear from other parents to share information, outline results and actions coming this year.

I too am very upset with where the state testing is today – DCAS is not what was promised, decisions that DDOE has made have been costly mistakes that are not only impacting our children’s schedules but also the district’s services.  BSD has to bring in MORE TESTING because DCAS is limited and the DDOE needs to be held accountable for bad decisions made.  They know the testing is inadequate but we need to make sure further mis-steps don’t put us further behind and waste more valuable resources.  I’m gathering information from as many different resources as I can – both internal and external to DDOE – and want to share them with those parents who can help and want to organize a consistent voice.

Thank you again to the all of the parents who have been following this blog and also the PTA at Lancashire.  I look forward to continued discussions together. Parents are a powerful force in children’s lives and their educational opportunities when we are engaged together.

BSD Parent Pledge - "MY PLEDGE"

Did you see in the packet of papers from your child's school (OR for those of us with older kids, it's probably in the bottom of the backpack still), the BLUE Sheet of paper marked "My Pledge"? 

• Find this paper
• Read it  
• Sign it
• Get it back to the school

The pledge and list of tasks many parents do, but surprisingly (maybe), many others don't.  This Pledge is the BSD's efforts to connect with parents throughout the district to begin a basic checklist of commitment with ALL PARENTS.  Let's work to get, at the least, 60% returned back to BSD to demonstrate our strong commitment to a simple grassroots effort like this.  It is simple to do, but how many of us actually saw this piece of paper and understood what to do?  And acted upon it?

What do you think of "My Pledge"?  Now that you've found it in the backpack -- Let me hear what you think.

PARENT ADVOCACY. What does that look like in ACTION?

To a lot of us, it is easier said than done; including the local and state administrations. Yet, we all know it’s important for our children’s education for parents to be involved.  So what ACTIONS do we see?

Parent Representation was definitely lacking at the recent Vision 2015 conference as far as speakers and organizers.  Congrats to the parents in the audience, who were first and foremost in the audience, and then secondly, able to get a question addressed by the speakers properly and/or in the work groups to identify parents and/or parent perspectives.  I think there were more questions proposed by parents than were presented.  This demonstrates our need as parents and/or parent organizations to get our voice heard. This event was a clear, measurable action that our parent voice is not part of the organizing and strategic dialogues happening throughout the state when it comes to our children’s education – at best it is only “lip-service”.

In the work group I attended about “World Class Leaders”, I did get an encouraging answer from about half of the panel (i.e. 2 out of 4) and one that just seemed to miss the whole point of the question.  But here is some of the good advice I did get:

• “Make yourself available” both during key events at the schools and in relation to your child’s direct daily life is HUGE -- it is part of “Being there”.
• Pick a topic that you are interested in and feel passionate about; and keep at it!  Don’t let one or two meetings or emails discourage you.
• Look at the ENVIRONMENT within the school buildings as well as the ACADEMICS.  Both contribute equally to the success of our children.
• Don’t invoke anything that would be at the detriment of other children as you advocate for yours.  A workable solution benefits all children within that school setting.
• Expect your principals to provide relevant and timely communication to you as a parent.  At the least, this could be through weekly newsletters, PTA attendance, and phone call blasts, but you should have a general level of communication and also feel free to set a meeting with a principal to discuss matters of importance to you.
• Know what resources are or are not available to your teachers.  The Common Core Standards are being rolled out, electronic tools are being made available within our school environments, and on-going training is always possible. These elements “raise the bar” as to the level of education expected by parents.  Are theses tools all in place for your teachers?

In also thinking about parents, there are so many different types of families, schedules and demands on parents and families today. I tried to break it down into specific, measurable actions that are relatively simple to fulfill the role of parent advocacy.  Each and every one of us can MAKE A RESOLUTION to do at least one of these tasks today.

ALL PARENTS – regardless of your life circumstances:

1.)    Join PTA – if nothing else this is a communications network to receive critical information as it develops in the coming year – on a variety of educational topics (not just sport booster clubs).  This group has been around for 100 years in DE and has some resources behind it – we need to tap into them this year!  (If you still can’t do that for whatever reason, at least become a member of this blog for ongoing updates.)

2.)    Attend an upcoming training event around Common Core Standards to understand where the levels of performance are being benchmarked for the future.  As these standards roll-out, there should be more and more opportunities to be “educated” on the topic(s), take advantage of them.

3.)    Get to know your District Board members – visit the district website and be familiar with the names & faces – at least know when the Board meets.

4.)    IF you are passionate about something your child does in school, inform the BSD referendum work groups. Contact info is on the BSD website, which you can access any time of the day.

5.)    Send an email/ written note to your child’s teacher thanking them for all they do.

6.)    Promise to complete every school or district survey that comes your way throughout the year.  Give honest and detailed information from the parent perspective.

7.)    Find a topic that you’re concerned about and learn all you can about the issues, challenges and successes around that topic.  For example, testing assessment, healthy cafeteria & food options, recess options for healthy kids, teacher evaluations, etc.  Research examples outside of the state via the Internet; ask parents from other schools, districts and states, etc. what examples they have for success.

8.)    Donate books back to the classrooms.  As your child gets older and their reading interests change, give your old books back to the BSD Parent Center for ongoing use that directly impacts our children and young adults.

Parents with flexible schedules:

9.)          Volunteer in the classroom and/or recess & lunch times – it’s just an hour a week or once a month if that’s all you can spare.

10.)      Let your school know if you have an area of “expertise” in which you could possibly make a presentation – like in music or science or art – or a cultural background of interest like Indian culture & sharing a family meal, or learning a second language like Chinese, etc.

11.)      Help with the next membership drive by “manning the table” and asking other parents to join PTA at any event you attend.

12.)      Visit the BSD Parent Center to become familiar with their resources and give input to some of your needs or desires as a parent.

Parents with strict working hours and/or difficult commutes:

13.)      Host a “brown bag” discussion in your place of business with other parent co-workers to learn from each other and together:  Invite other working BSD parents and your DE PTA representative Region 1 (that’s me) to discuss a specific topic.

14.)      Ask your teacher if there is anything you can help with outside of the classroom to assist with the next classroom project – picking up supplies, making or buying a food item or craft items, organizing files, etc.

15.)      Understand which extra clubs or activities support STEM and the Arts in your school environment.  Sponsor another child who may not be able to cover a registration fee for such activities.

16.)      Send an extra $5 into the next Book Fair for another student who may not have the same means.

17.)      Use a vacation day (or two) and chaperone a school trip.  It seems like such a hassle to miss a day of work, but the rewards and insight you get by being with your child and their peers is invaluable.  Plus, you get to remember what it was like to be a kid again too.  (And some days, don’t we all need that.)

Walk the Talk

So I’ve gotten a few blog responses about previous postings – which is great fun!  It means the parent dialogue is slowly starting and we’re “finding each other” as far as areas of interest.  Plus, by sharing information, we’ll learn so much more together in a shorter amount of time.

So here are a few updates:

• PTA Representation: I “challenged” parents to join their PTA and/or local parent group.  In response, I have agreed to be the BSD representative for the DE PTA.  It is my understanding that it perhaps has been YEARS since BSD had a representative at the state PTA.  So now is our chance to gather more resources, get involved in some of the state efforts that are directly impacting our classrooms (i.e. DCAS details, Common Core understanding, etc.) and demonstrate our parent commitment to education throughout our district. Let me know what you’d like to hear from the state level and/or resources our district parents need. I believe in the power and passion of parents for their kids, so let me know how we can work together to set the bar higher.

• RttT BUDGET!!!:  I’ve tracked down some figures – so this will at least give us a starting point for the initial allocation of funding under BSD’s plans for RttT.  In very simple terms, for BSD their RttT funds in Year 1 were allocated to: 
• 60% staffing
• 20% trainings
•   6% supplies & materials
•   7% contracted services
•   7% indirect costs

I am trying to get clarification from the district as to their definition of contracted services and indirect costs, so an update will be coming.

In addition, some very detailed-focused parents also sent me resources to track the grant funding from a state and national perspective in a much more detailed level.  Happy to share in greater circulation if requested, but I’m thinking busy parents only want the “big picture highlights” before going into too much more detail.  Again, let me know if my assumptions are correct.

o        Vision 2015 Conference:  I did attend this Rodel Foundation event yesterday and have mixed feelings as to the content.  The biggest omission to me, once again, was a parent voice.  There were federal, state and panel representatives throughout the day.  Occasionally the parents might be mentioned in a list of stakeholders, but our perspective and opinions were not strongly voiced. And I think we need to change that!  I’ll have a future posting dedicated to more about this event, but the other items that stand out for me the next day are:

§         Parents need to get involved – NOW. 

§         William Budinger, the Founder of the Rodel Foundations, “gets it” as to the profound educational shift our children are facing today compared to previous generations.

§         The advantage of Delaware being a small state that can respond quickly by gathering resources together is equally disadvantaged by the “bubble” of local influence and perspectives that seem to perpetuate itself – if the DE school systems were so great, we wouldn’t need RttT!

§         The educational jargon distorts real results.  I didn’t get a good comfort feeling that things are improving for kids in a positive way, quickly enough.

o        ADVOCACY for our children by their parents has been proven to be the difference that turns around school districts and education.  The administrations, principals and teachers can’t complete this huge endeavor without communities, businesses and most importantly parents being involved.  And it can be simple things that we do together -- better understanding of the building cultures, volunteering for field trips, educating parents as to grade level goals, challenging the results of state tests not being what was promised, etc.  More to come on this in future postings!

Let me hear from you as to your parent perspective on this posting and/or other topics.